SGT807-4

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Other Editions

Editorial Room for the Spring 807 Edition

Quotable Quotes

  • Braegon - I'll blow him before I get in close.
  • Sabrina - We could go back and try the threesome.
  • Dramus - Hang on, Things are bad enough that Sabrina's asking for help and we're going closer?!?
  • Logan - I had hundreds of children rub their hands on my staff, up and down, to make it extremely smooth.

Insidious Rumours

What's Hot, What's Not

Hot

  • Getting Lost
  • Resurrection
  • Sabrina in Melee
  • Standing behind Melb in melee combat
  • Changing Your Aspect
  • Apprentice Trolls

Not

  • Walking for hours through snow
  • Talking to the Dead
  • Sabrina hiding behind the mages
  • Rejecting Aspects from Powers
  • Undead Squirrels

Recent Adventures / News in Brief

Eltranian Excitements

If Eltrandor didn't have enough issues with magical storms putting a dent in their Navy, and their King being off-colour, a large portion of their taxes got nicked. As in many rare items stored in multiple chests with centuries-old protection magic. The Dowager Queen had the good sense to call on the Guild to recover it, as anyone who thought they could get past the protection would obviously have access to powerful means. Labolas, President and Master of Murderers, was behind a plot to weaken Eltrandor. After a close fight in Baretskyne, he and his Pack of Hellhounds were sent back, and various followers and consorts dealt with.

Demons evicted from Shorapur

Shorapur, one of the Five Sisters, was recently freed from a motley collection of Dark Circle lieutenants working for Alloces the Warrior Duke. After being liberated by a Guild Party, Shorapur is now being jointly administered by the notorious pirate Orc Capt Bazcot and the Urielite vampire hunter Sister Suspicion is Proof. The party has insisted on a strict division of Church and State, to avoid further conflicts. The castle storehouses were opened to the starving townsfolk, and the last of the vampires were hunted down. While remaining threats to Shorapur include Illiyas, a ex-succubus of Seir’s, many of the Free Mages of the city, civil war, and continued economic ruin, the Guild has at least given Shorapur a chance to get to it’s feet and struggle on.

Scaleryx mugged again

This crafty and powerful Black Dragon has had a bad run of it since his mistress Rashak died. This season he was lured from his cave in Azuria by a lunatic assault by some Elvendar elves, only to discover on his return that half his loot had been not stolen, but destroyed. In unrelated news, his old nemesis Sabrina completed successful negotiations on a delicate treaty with a group of Elvandar warriors some two weeks before. Scaleryx has sworn “by the claw she cut off” that he will have his revenge. Sabrina was washing her hair and unavailable for comment.

New Players in Town

Update your notebooks, Demon-spotters – there’s a couple of new powers in town. First, Illiyas is a Capricorn who enjoys long walks along the beach and bending men to her every whim. She is a woman of considerable beauty and allure, her words are as honey, with her wit as the bee-sting. Seduction is second nature to her, and men's brains cease to function clearly when near. She is always happy to negotiate, as she tends to have the upper hand in such situations, but if bound to a deal, she is compelled to betray it. She used to work as a succubus, but has struck out on her own, basing herself in Alusia, and playing tricks on her old boss Seir, his minion Vychan, and any man with a pulse. She is said to be keen on ‘helping out’ against the Calamar. She changes shape at will, and cannot be destroyed by normal means. Silverfoam can summon her ‘as if an agent’… The second new local is a Spider Demon. This huge arachnid has recently consumed a large part of Malphas the Deceiver, and it’s power continues to grow. It’s main web is in a cavern over a lava pit in the Isles of Freedom; it has caused considerable trouble there. Current allies include the Lich Lord Arandal of the Plateau of Decay, the Children of the Rift, and (indirectly) the Calamar. Current enemies include most of the Insect Shamans of the Isle, and the Guild. This spider demon specialises in poisons, (interdimensional) webs, scrying, mass possession, and sucking the insides out of its opponents.

King Ulric to get Hitched

Factotums of King Ulric were seen holding long talks with chaperones to the Duchess Meredith over Winter. With the two kids less than a year apart, and both looking for alliances to strengthen their positions, what could be more natural than a royal wedding? The list of appropriate suitors for Ulric is short – the Princesses of Eltrandor and Artzdorf are all married, Brandenburg is without female offspring, and anywhere else would distort his foreign policy – unless he married off-plane, or a local beauty from inside his kingdom. Duchess Meredith of Ranke has a similarly empty dance card. The SGT astrologers predict an Autumn wedding.

Magical Plague Foiled

A Guild party led by Brundar and Logan has stopped a devastating plague that had killed thousands of people. This plague was created by the Calamar and their undead allies, and was spread through the free distribution of thousands of plague amulets. These amulets made the wearer resist the plague for much longer, but also increased it’s virility and contagion, so those protected acted as carriers and catalysts before succumbing themselves. Other amulets were also found, including those of ‘LoganBane’, specifically created to prevent Logan’s economic and magic powers from obliterating his opponents. A few LoganBanes are still available – hurry, stocks are limited!

Exsanguination College

Just when you thought you had all the counterspells – another type of Blood magics appears. These evil Exsanguinists are in league with the Calamar. They use ritual magics and the souls and suffering of children and innocents to power their magics, which cause torment, hideous disfigurement and rapid death. For instance: Rain of Blood is a moving area which causes near-instant death, and there is no known form of protection or resistance; Black Serenade strips Souls; Cauldron of Blood is a scrying magic that can only be defeated in the spirit realm; and the list of suffering goes on. Counterspells will be available at the Guild shortly.

Guild News

Viola - Changing Her Way

We are pleased to hear that Viola has renounced her pact with Renove and returned all his favours. She was seduced down a dark path at a young age and now sees that this is the wrong way. A guild party led by Engleton took Viola on a spirit quest to free her soul. Now she can make her own decisions, though Liessa continues to quote from the 4th book of "just say no to demons - a practical study"

Columns and Articles

Classifieds (Selling Services and Stuff)

Can you please put Lucius' advertisement for a greater enchantment back in please?

Bestiary

Riddles and Puzzles

Letters

Humour

Special Notices